Oculama

A really cool set up to have individual Tests, with one at the very start and the other introduced at the end!
Awesome colors and shot compositions, it was really fun to see everyone in alternate fancy outfits. Having read the intro comic compilation you posted onto Oculama here, it feels like a nice callback with the dresses and dancing.
The only part I was confused on was on page 7, with the apples dissipating and such. I think that's because I wasn't sure if they were already in the scene or appeared with Lucy's powers.
But again, I love the coloring, it feels appropriately moody. It almost makes me wish the panels on pages 3 and 5 also took up more of the page like the other pages, since the white takes away from the moody-ness a bit.

Although you say you submitted 'lame sketches' they're still really readable and filled with character! It was never confusing and I like the range of expressions on display here.
The paneling and compositions flow largely flow well, page 4 is paneled in a way that draw my eye right to left, rather than left to right, but the drawing themselves guide the eyes well, so it might just be my manga-riddled brain being drawn to the largest panel on the right first.
Other than that, I think the sense of movement the the last two pages is really strong, I could easily imagine where the characters were spatially.

Even if you could only give us sketches, they still look good! I like how we get right into the middle of the action, but it's easy to follow along with what's happening. I enjoyed the dynamic angles and action shots, even when they're just talking back and forth, it stays visually interesting. I do think the ending is a little bit abrupt though, it maybe could have benefitted from another panel or two of resolution.

I like the unique set up you've established, with the Test feeling very personalized, and leaving a lot of intrigue. The school dance set up is a cool backdrop for the story, and I liked seeing all of the characters in their fancy outfits, and having the heated confrontation while dancing is super fun. I liked your use of panel layouts, page 2 especially standing out to me as a very striking opening. I'm eager to see where the story goes.

I shake you around for calling the sketches ‘lame’ when they were fantastic…!

Even if they were sketches, the round was clear and readable, and the shading & effect lines in the back added good atmosphere and movement. The speech bubbles were well placed, helping guide the reader’s eyes smoothly. The character expressions were great in showcasing emotions as well!

I think the only thing I wished for was to have been able to see the ‘charging in’ part of the story as well, even if it was a short, montage like flash back (or even single panels in between).The writing does explain it well so we are never not lost in what happened, but I just thought it would have made it even more entertaining if it was visually shown

However, with the limited page and time for rounds given, I don’t think starting from the ‘twist’ of the story itself is a bad thing, as it is the part we all want to see, after all! Likewise, this was a really fun read!

Ooh, this was such a great comic, both visually and entertainment wise!

The paneling kept the comic easy to follow at a good pace, and all the different angles made it very visually entertaining. The colors felt uniformed and added to the clarity of the comic as well! I loved how you depicted the abilities for both Lucy and Pascaline, visually and its use story-wise.

I think the only part I got a bit confused about was the story on the first page. I initially thought the letter was sent AFTER the round, and the whole round was a flashback to how the letter came to be. Perhaps something like showing Pascaline’s expression before approaching Lucy (as a hint she already knows the content of the letter) might have added a bit of clarity?

However, the story was completely clear on a second reading, so please take that with a grain of salt! Overall, the comic served as a great standalone chapter as well as a great introduction to Lucy’s story, and I am excited to see what happens next!

Your sketches are very lovely! Very clear and easy to read while having a lot of personality!

I also did like the approach of just dropping right into the action! Starting in the middle of the test was a nice move. It was also cool how you had them ultimately combine their powers and team up to accomplish finishing the test.

My only critique is the ending feels a little abrupt, but it is a week long drawing time so I understand getting it done.
Nice work!

I am always so impressed with what you are able to put out in such a short time frame.
This is such a great start and set up of a story. Makes me really excited to see what you have cooking up.

I also really like what you did with the panel layout on page 6, really neat way to show some of her powers and make it feel disorienting while still having clarity for the reader.

Honestly, any critiques I have feel kinda nitpicky, especially given the one week drawing time.
Good work dude!

I adore the conceit of participants in a test getting their instructions separately, in unconventional ways, and in such a way to set them against one another without their immediate knowledge. Your doing so here makes for a great premise for this round itself, but also establishes a delicious bit of intrigue for the potential chapters to follow.

You get a tremendous amount of mileage out of that window throughout this comic. The combination of rain and starlight pulls a lot of weight in setting the stage, adding a bit of glamour and tense energy to the room from the get-go, and it frames so many of the action shots beautifully. The full-page dance shot on page 4 is the obvious example, but my personal favorite is the side-view shot at the top of page 7. (I also enjoy how seamlessly the floor disappears into Pascaline's windstorm.

(The rain effect you've captures here is gorgeous, both from the safety of the dance floor and when HMW ends up outside getting drenched by it)

Up front, I like how well you set the stage for the entirety of the comic. A lot of the action on the back end is sparing on the setting details, which heightens the action itself, but you do such a tidy job establishing the layout of the area on the first page that it's easy for a reader to picture the action the space is happening in throughout the remainder.

Great mix of distances and angles from panel to panel here. The action shots are a standout strength, and what really give the comic overall legs to run. They get me itching to see more of Pascaline in action, with or without a teammate in the mix.

Overall a very efficient execution of storytelling in four pages, making the stakes feel appreciably high and delivering on the impromptu team building that make these sort of training and/or test storylines as rewarding as they are. I'm excited to see even more of your work going forward.

Shame that life stuff happened but these are some real clean sketches, very clear to read through and understand. The action is super neat on that final segment, the two sides coming together like a dance...wait a minute!

As for the story, I like the dynamic set up between both characters and how they work together, you love to see the girlies getting the W.

An overall good read and hope that you come back for more tourneys in the future!

(points at screen) There she is! That's my girl! Wahoo!

Okay, now that's over, another Ninja banger! Great job on the art as usual, the atmosphere you created with the rain is top notch. The dance setting is a really nice one, love all the fancy clothes you came up with for all the cameos!

The story is an intriguing one, very interested to see how it leads on with HMW taking up a more antagonist angle to most of the other contestants! Excited for your next round!

Even with the sketches, the comic's great looking. Your handle and skill is still very evident. In media res is an excellent decision since time was a premium here. I'd actually love to see more adventures with young Pascaline at some point. It feels very neat to see a hero trying to figure themselves out. On the whole, very little critique from me. This comic's not finished, but the building blocks are all here and it looks great. Hopefully we see more Swan soon. Great work!

This was an interesting start! Very intriguing little beginning and clearly you've got a journey in mind here for the character. I suppose a big part of this will be dependent on seeing the next rounds. However, this is decently promising! I really like the way you drew the wind effect - it was very effective. You still have some shading issues and your values are still similar in a lot of spots, but I do see some that are looking better. Just try to pay attention to the values you use, because it really helps your work when you're on the ball there. I am interested in seeing what you end up doing next round. Good work!

Great cute rendering of little Pascaline, having seen so much of her in the past it's nice seeing a little flashback episode of her time in training. Action and posing are strong as usual with your work, even if a little sketchy it's very legible from the first to the last panel. The texture filter might not need to have been as strong as it was placed, it might have worked a little better at a lower opacity, but I think the tint was just right.

Interesting setup and definitely interesting cliffhanger moment! While I would have like some pre-dance setup, the dialogue feels natural between the two, though I have personal preferences of Pascaline's writing style that aren't your fault at all, it's simply the nature of that character having existed for so long with so many pages in other comics spaces, that she comes off different here. Color-rendering and composition remains strong. Sound effects are a bit roller-coaster, some are really nice, some could use more work, though I recognize the limitations of a speed battle.

Im a sucker for seeing the sketchy manga style you have going on and I think it works well for the chaotic heat of battle moment you have going on for this round! While I am always a slave to color and polish even if I cant get it your art style shines through on just what you have here alone! the choice to go for a team up I think is a great and helps showcase jcee's inexperience and gives both your opponent and her a chance to shine without having to go to deep into a brawl between the two :) nothing really critical to say on this comic great job!

Still in top form for comics especially in short page counts! alot of information is established early and moves the story quickly into the meat and potatoes of the conflict and I like that plus the gala dresses looked really cool on everyone and gave an elegance to the throwdown. Lucy is setting up to be a cool underdog fighting her way through all this mystery and intrigue so Im interested to see more of her and explain her past with Eve!