Oculama

You both are moving like juggernauts through this tournament, gaining momentum and improving your submissions by bounds each round.

The art I want to address first – you’re working in an increasingly varied range of angles and distances that make your pages a lot more engaging – would definitely encourage you to keep pursuing what you’ve been putting into practice; it’s working gangbusters.

I also really love how much you explored Mo’s expressions and emotions, both at the forefront of the action, and as the visual focus when other characters are talking. It really sets the mood of the comic – more on that later.

The composition of page 7 is really terrific. The current Xylem design look incredibly cool (the plant dragon/ monster conceit really came together this round), and the reversed reflection of Mo in the water on the bathroom floor looks real spiffy.

Mo’s hallucinations are really well executed. The quick shifts between what’s really happening and what she perceives early on in the action do a good job elevating the tension, and the more explicit unreality of her visions do a nice job transitioning the reader into the next stage of the story.

Mo’s breakdown throughout this comic is the crown jewel of the story, in my estimation. This all leading up to the reveal that EFFI had intentionally erased part of Mo’s memory, and thus her personality, was an awesome payoff. That EFFI did it for clearly less than altruistic reasons was absolutely delicious.

(The “welcome back, Mopaz” line was SO good, for real. I got chills)

Overall, Mo and EFFI form an incredible heart of this comic. The mood of the comic at nay given point really revolves around Mo’s state of mind, and you’ve done commendable work saturating the panels and pages with her fear, her uncertainty, and her panic. EFFI feels like the balancing humour to Mo at the start, but it becomes clear really quickly that she’s a flaky prophylactic at best in this regard, and sure enough, Mo turns out to be her own worst enemy all the way up to the moment of her death.

The transition to a potential final round here is intriguing. With Beekeeper dealt a seemingly fatal wound, and Xylem vowing to “fix” him, it conjures a lot of interesting potential for a finale.

Outstanding stuff. I’m impressed by the level of storytelling and the increasing daring of your layouts. Your collaboration is bearing tremendous fruit.

Mo and EFFI’s story has been terrific to follow so far, and this chapter is no exception.

The best of your page compositions have been getting better and better each round. The page 3 full-pager of EFFI behind the shattered glass and reflections was incredibly striking, and puts a great punctuation mark on the emotions that the previous round alluded to without illustrating quite so explicitly as we see here. It’s a nice catharsis, and a beautiful piece of art.

Speaking of compositions, the arrangement of the room where EFFI and Mo come across Xylem and Beekeeper is extraordinarily laid-out. The two corpses, noted but never made note of, are effectively disquieting decorations that put the scene on edge out the gate, and I especiallylike how Xylem’s body festoons the walls.

The swaps from Beekeeper’s PoV of a small Xylem with Mo and EFFI seeing her full “real” form work terrifically. A sort of dramatic irony that both the readers and (most of) the characters are in on together. There’s something heartbreakingly tender about the way he embraces her, and it makes the turnaround of Xylem deciding she doesn’t need/ want him anymore all the more gutting.

Tons of great little bits in the art throughout here that come together nicely to elevate the comic. EFFI’s antenna curling into a heart when it reaches out to Mo (the expressiveness of her antenaa really reached its peak in this comic, tbh). Xylem’s reflection in the knife on the top of page 11. The tints of blue in Mo’s eyes toward the end (her moles being additional eyes(?) when she begins to transform was a terrific decision – a payoff for something I didn’t expect there to be payoff for). All terrific touches that show off your respective expertise in comics.

The most successful thing this comic offers the reader is hope. Despite the turmoil clearly coming to a head between Mo and EFFI, you dangle and (so far) deliver on the hope that they still will go to bat for each other, and that each care about the other’s well being. You also put forward the hope that there is a real affection between beekeeper and Xylem, and while only half of that is delivered on, the betrayal by Xylem does impart some flavor to the story – a story where the characters seem not fully certain what each other are.

Great work on this. You’re spinning a really intriguing tale this tournament, and you’ve nailed the pacing in doling out answers.

I really like this descent into madness type beat poor little mopie had to endure, felt like a proper alien homage too with how horrifying the lead up to the final encounter was. The length of the comic is also something to feel accomplished with, helping with the horror vibe too by drawing it out, but i feel like no specific single pages were jumping out to me. A little more visual intrigue in some panels would help break up and add more identity to each page. (I fink)

I was listening to Tiao Cruz Dynamite while reading this and it helped enhance the experience by making this comic less tragic because you guys are cruel monsters for doing what you did to all these characters. I really love the environmental work in all these scenes too, I got a really good strong sense of the space the characters were taking place in and I was totally sucked in. I wish there was just a little bit more to it though! There was powerful emotions i wanted to sit in a bit longer.

The story is fully of grizzly twists and turns. The plot point with the heart beats was giving me Telltale Heart vibes - good spooky stuff. You had some very interesting compositions, particularly with the monster reveal and how you divided panels with smoke, though I felt like your opponent's draftsmanship and paneling was stronger. *spoilers* For Effie being sentient it made my heart ache that she ended up being so cold. Fitting continuation on all fronts.

Oof, just hitting us with the heartbreak right away huh? I like when you use the shape of the speech bubbles to subtly reveal Effie acting a bit more sentient (same with last story). As ever, you really have some wonderful compositions. I think that Doe's textured style benefitted your choice to remain largely in greyscale. You made good choices for switching who did which lines. OOGH that reveal at the end. THEYRE EYES???? THE WHOLE TIME??

This one got me in my old footiniheart. Pizza's writing is always the most formidable part of your comic battling repertoire. Having ninja amd doe's characters' relationship fall apart in real time was a clinching factor in this battle. The lines about Effie just saying she just doesn't like doe's character made the deaths really hit home for me. I do still wonder why there is aways some bees involved though. Makes for a neat recurring motif.

Space really do be making us mad out here. The evocative compositions and just all the little lines and details on the line art gave the story that extra punch and helped sell the writing that much more. Just as heartbreaking as the others side but on the opposite end, An absolutely normal innocent plant girl (and not a monster) just wanted to cling to life. Her delusional but we'll meaning bee themed father made the story all the more tragic.

Really great ramp up on the emotionality depicted page to page. Your expression and reactions to the story unfolding really drive your story beats home. Also its great to see that next to Effi's unsettling static grin despite the dirty deeds that ensue. The change in word bubbles I think is a great nod to something other overtaking Beekeeper, but I do wish there was more of a physical tell as you are hindered by a character without face. You are left to rely on their body language or even something other creative to get your intent across which I think may of missed the mark in the big final reveal.
I am curious what 'fix' truly entails- and like your opponents you leave us readers with big questions that could swing our vote in order to learn more. Very clever!

I continue to be impressed by your environment and spacecraft design. the interiors interspersed with the greenery of your opponent is really neat. It can be easy to complicate the interiors of a futuristic spacecraft and do too much, especially with inks, but you two manage to pull off just enough to give the ship as much personality as the characters.
And SPEAKING of characters...man. Talk about putting peep through the torment nexus. The paranoia, doubt and even mounting germaphobia of parasites everywhere just ramping up to such unsettling intrigue with the eye change. Throughout it all I can't ignore how tight these two have become, which leaves me gnawing at my fingernails as to how Effi and Mo's conclusion is going to come to pass.

This was a fantastic comic. The story was a really punch above the previous rounds, as was the art. Truth be told, you really went in there swinging so hard and in terms of your artistic development Pizza Man, you've been really growing and improving a lot lately. You should be very proud of your efforts with this comic. On the whole, this was a great entry and a great run in this entire tournament. Excellent job.

The amount of work you guys are doing is incredible. Doe, your work is so, so crisp looking. It's absolutely gorgeous and looks amazing.The inks are so detailed and unique looking and your style is so gorgeous on all levels. Ninja, the story this round and entire tournament has been terrific. It's going to be really difficult to see how the finals go with you two, but it's been a really great journey. Fantastic work!