Shoutout to Horo and JG I remember being little baby reading y'alls comics in Rayuba (I fully 100% studied y'all early on to get better). Was a fun match shame that yall need to die. -Ninja
Voting is closed.
DOCTOR ZE GURLS, ZEY ARE GETTING SAPPHIC! Absolutely wonderful work you two! Your inks, your page compositions, your colors, they're all so incredibly tasty and I am absolutely eating it up! I just love how absolutely pathetic Dada is, they're such a sopping wet little meow meow of a man, and Eisel the man whose somehow the most done with it all in the entire comic!!! Bonjour, mon drôle de petit bonhomme, <3! God, the colors used on Dada just have me awooga'ing constantly, and they work so well despite the comic being mostly B/W and grey! Auggh just gotta say I love the font change for the self destruction panel! OOYou two absolutely killed it, hell fucking yeah!
OOOOOH! The ink work in this comic is turning me feral, I love it so much. Comic has everything going for it, wonderful inks, splendid onomatopoeia, and phenomenal action and movement! That's not even touching the expert use of two tone shading, and the dialogue which is to die for! OOOOUGH THE ART STYLE SHIFTS FOR THE COPIES! I am here for it ALL! The interactions between the cast is absolutely delightful, love the love-hate relationship of Corb and Beretta, and this depiction of Eisel is such a delight! I just can't get enough of this, I'm floored how you managed to put out such high quality work in only 2 weeks!
Writintg this as I read.
Your setup is excellent. Super captivating stuff as always, I almost struggle to remember to actually write things down here as I read through it. Your art is so efficient, and the two of you managed to blend your art styles so seamlessly I at times forgot two people worked on this. The horse panel got me. Your jokes land super well, and the textured brushes you've used work well together, and certainly also help make your art styles blend. Your use of sound effects is really good. More people should end their comics with a 4koma, I think.
I've been ending my other reviews with a piece of advice for going forward, but I honestly don't have anything to tell you here. Super solid comic. I feel like a hack giving you a triple 5, but this is just overall a super solid story. Corb's really cool. Also, I ship it. -C
Writing this as I go, forgive any linguistic weirdness.
The intro is really strong. All the context needed in one page. I like the colours you've got going for Dr. Dada, but I think it's a shame that he's the only one with any colour. You see a little with Eisel, but not that much. Speaking of which, the way you write Eisel is fantastic. His accent really comes through - I had a lot of fun reading his lines out loud. I think the length of your comic unfortunately blocks you from really telling the best story possible, I think a lot of the story is cut short. I am a huge fan of short comics, personally, but I think your story had too much to say with too little room to say it. Going forward, I want to see you decide early on what is the most essential parts of the story, and cut anything superfluous. I don't necessarily think you had much to cut here, but with that being said - when this story is as bare-bones as it is, and in spite of that feels super compressed, perhaps it is not the most efficient story to tell. Staying super true to your characters (and opponents' characters) usually results in you needing WAY more context for your story, which isn't always possible to give.
Overall, strong stuff, but I would like to see you get more streamlined.
LOVE the art here. The style and setting evoke for me a lot of the older Doom Patrol comics, specifically the arcs with the Brotherhood of Dada. I love all the art easter eggs tucked away in the gallery too (I giggled when I saw the Fountain on the floor, and seeing Corb/ Beretta echo Der Kuss at the end was sososo cute).
There were a few spots here and there where I ran into same static parsing what was happening visually. It wasn't until the second read-through that I gathered the patrons on page 4 were panicking because of Corb (I had assumed they were running away from something in the direction she was walking towards - I think not seeing her sword hid my cue that she was the source of their concern?). Additionally, whatever happens between pages 10 and 11 had me flipping back and forth a few times to try to get clarity (I'm guessing Dada does something to halt Eisel's attack? Figuring out what his powers were in play took me a few pages further to figure out).
Honestly those gripes are all small potatoes in the long run, because this comic is just so fun to look at. The gallery space is so well-crafted, and the destruction it undergoes over the course of the story only makes it feel all the more real. The setting feels appropriately dense, and I've got to give especial props to how expressive you made Dada and Eisel in your story - they are perfectly readable from a drawing standpoint alone, and never feel anything but right at home in the artwork.
Writing is overall solid; this moves at well-measured clip, dipping *slightly* into being a bit slow on the action sequences, but I'm hard-pressed to really *be* pressed about that when all the pages are so fun to look at. I like the time spent on setting up the scene with Dada and Beretta up front, and the time spent to establish everyone's motives/ stakes without rushing through. Leisurely is the word I'd us, and leisurely is a lovely way to get to read a story.
(Alsooooo, LOVE the "but you didn't" bookend gag. made me laugh~)
Strong, STRONG work on this one. A standout in my mind, no doubt.
Oooooh, this one's a lot of fun. You nailed a lot of great character notes with relatively few character-focused pages, from Beretta's barely-tolerant exasperation, Corb's "aw-shucks" cavalierness, Dada's goofy cowardice, and Eisel's absolutely delightful frenchness. (My sister uses "Putan" as an affectionate put-down all the time~~~).
The art here has a lot of nice notes; the setups are pretty readable, the characters a varying (but appropriate) level of cartoon-y, and the contrast of Dada's form against the black and white was especially effective (I like it both to mark him as the goal of the bounty hunters' pursuit and to emphasize the danger when he panics and loses control). The shift to full color for the last page gets a real boost from all the decisions y'all made throughout.
(Minor notes - LOVED dada stripping the coat off, and the final embrace between beretta and corb is nicely sad and sweet)
Similar to the other side of this fight, there were a few bits where I had a bit of trouble parsing what had happened and where. The first bit was tracking eisel's movement in the opening - he starts to the right of Corb, sneaks behind her, gets shot, and then is lying/ ambushes her from the right again? The second was tracking exactly where Beretta gets cut in half - it's easy to understand her getting caught up in either Dada's outburst or the confrontation of Dada's art form with Corb, but by the end I was unclear if she was bisected because of something Dada did, or because of Corb.
The story is pretty simplistic, but you build a solidly entertaining tale around that foundation. Acknowledging that that's not explicitly *why* he has a bounty out on him, I love the conceit of an art dealer trying to set up a gallery in the middle of nowhere while the law tries to track 'em down. It teases just enough unsaid things happening out of sight of the comic that makes it feel nicely anchored in a larger world. The dialogue is nicely sharp, and convincing in its balance of humor and peril for a high-stakes situation.
Excellent job overall, and some very fun characters you've brought to bear for the DBD! Hope you both can get some well-earned rest over the break week!
Extremely well-paced, effortless read. The choice to go for a minimal color palette (black white and some accent greys) was absolutely the right one; it made the entire thing extremely easy to read and let your inks and joke delivery sing. Even better I could barely tell when the two of you traded off; your styles meshed unbelievably well. If I hadn't seen your work for as long as I have, I wouldn't have been able to tell at all, and I'm pretty sure I'm STILL gonna have trouble seeing who did what.
It especially worked with the depiction of Dada and Eisel, and ESPECIALLY when their art started to go off the rails and you started pulling in newspaper clippings and turning their sound effects into a collage. The fact that both "teams" were barely even teams at all really made the entire thing fun to read, and the setup of it all just being a big botched museum robbery was perfect for hijinks. Honestly the only thing I could've wanted more of would be to see Corb and Mietta develop but this is such an unbelievably solid introduction to the two that I can't be upset.
Alright so I want to be abundantly clear that this is just a good comic. It's a really good comic. Y'all did a good job of maintaining the quality throughout, saving the color for very big moments and/or Dada and the big final scene with Corb and Beretta. It made their death stick out much more than it would have otherwise, and the setup of "We Have To Kill Dada" is a really good way to introduce conflict. And I think that just immediately starting it off with Dada Destructively Defeated is inherently really funny.
That being said It feels very much like the time crunch was upon you; as great as some scenes looked, others were maybe not as clear as they could have been, and Beretta's death felt almost contrived! I had no idea how or why she was detonating, aside from She Took A Big Hit. I think establishing that earlier might have helped, but I also understand that two weeks is not a lot of time to put everything together.
But I still very much enjoyed reading it! In the end, I just hope to see y'all keep on making comics.
At the risk of sounding hyperbolic, this was an absolute masterclass of a comic. Funny and stunning in equal measure, filled with page after page of "okay I changed my mind, *this* is my favorite panel." Horo and jg crammed a ton of characterization, action, and emotion into a comic short enough to not overstay its welcome but long enough to maintain a comfortable pace.
I also want to point out the setup: for a tournament without a unifying storyline to build off of, everything about the characters' meeting and interactions was delightfully organic.
If there are nits to pick in the art or writing, I'm not clever enough to find them. Well done.
Would that I could give top marks for the sapphique joke alone, but alas.
No real complaints to be made about the art, and credit especially goes to the use of colors and offbeat paneling in the last few pages. The action was brisk and entertaining as well and I very much enjoyed the final gags of Eisel's attempted skedaddle. I do, however, think the comic's compactness worked against it as far as characterization; we got a taste of Miette's and Corb's dynamic, but not enough to make Corb's final sacrifice feel justified.
Like, I know and you know they're yuri, but that's metagaming.
In addition Dada and particularly Eisel didn't get the chance to really show who they were outside of "panicky and volatile" and "aggressively (not) French," respectively. Another page or two to get into their heads wouldn't have hurt.
Still, a strong entry by any metric.
The staging in this is so good, it always feels simple but it's so dense with information. It still knows when to pull back though, especially great when it wants to focus on a singular punchline or dramatic beat. Some of the separation of actions in the paneling makes things a little more confusing, but the comic actually feels like it gets better in that aspect as the scene goes on. The writing's just as strong, it's funny and weird but always with a genuine emotional weight to the characters. We get to see just enough of each character that you just have to see more. Wonderful comic.
The pipeline for this comic is so interesting, seeing both of your styles blend feels both natural and precise. This is especially so in how you both use the spot blacks, clearly stealing strength from each other to make something wild and cohesive. Your paneling too is so effectively dramatic, although I feel like the timing of a couple pages stumble, feeling too long or too short. It's a small price to pay for such lovely drama though, every action and shift in the characters feels weighty and earned. The small bits of comedy in the dark storyline work surprisingly well, encapsulated perfectly by Eisel's dumb little face as Mietta and Corb give their lives for each other. Lovely comic.
guys. GUYS,. ... you DONE did GOOD guys...... not as if I expected anything different, but I think you made a fun, fast paced, stylish, economic, well balanced comic with some excellent gags and a solid heart. No tipping this bad boy over!!! I loved seeing the girls personalities come out on the page; they felt very physically real, with great body language and expressions. The action sequences, especially Corb against Big Dada, absolutely fucked supremely and I want to eat all the cool action panels.
Critting this one is hard... I think the transition between page 10 and 11 took a bit of rereading for me to understand what happened. Also, I knew from the framing of the story that the splash panel on 19 was meant to reference The Kiss, but I think the slight difference in pose from the painting and the addition of the sword in the composition muddies this reference. I only made the connection on my second read through, though I loved it when I got it.
Overall you guys smashed it though. 10/10 horse.jpg
I love how vibrant and full your pages are!! Your focus on Corb and Mietta made for a fun intro and was generous to your opponents, which is always nice to see in OCT's. I really enjoyed seeing how much fun you had playing with panel borders and shape, and your spot blacks and greys were really strong and controlled. I think one of the bolder pages is 6, which I really enjoy-- panels could have easily become lost in the detail of the cracks in the earth, but I like the flow and how Dr Dada guides the eye. Also the sapphique line was gold, we all love the sapphique line, screencap of the round imo.
While the dialogue was very characterful and fun, I to think the plot itself was a bit thin and could have used either some complication or some action between corb and eisel while mietta and dada were facing off. I also found it a bit unclear how mietta got damaged-- I assume she got chomped my monster-dada? Or perhaps fused with him to create monster-dada? If the latter is the case, some more visual hints to make this clearer would have helped, or even an extended fight scene. I think the bones of the concept were great, but needed a bit more flesh on them to really pack the punch it was looking to give.
One other thing I'll note is that the size of your pages are huge-- My internet is not great at the best of times, but it was taking up to 3-5 minutes for me to load a single page at a time. It's not something I'm meaningfully scoring against or anything, but uploading a reduced size image would really help folks like me haha, it made a big impact on how I experienced the comic.
Besides all that though, great work!! really fun!! I love this duo!!! Excited to see you guys work together in the future!!!
I like the hat tip panel on page 1, has swag has personality.
I will not lie. I was not expecting stripping to work.
I feel like page 5 panels 2 and 3 are unclear. It took me a hot minute to realise that Eisel was wafting up from the white holes in the paint puddle (maybe? if that's what's happening?). Would've made more sense if you'd shown the bleeding easel on the ground behind Corb in panel 1.
I like the glasses used as panel frames here.
Corb with the friendly fire!
HFUIRSHIFUEISHFIE sfUIBSIUAh HBFRSIH FSEDIJES HEISF DR DADA WAKE UP THEY'RE HAVING A FUCKING LESBIAN MOMENT OVER THERE AND THAT SHIT'S TERMINAL. SCOOPS YOU UP LIKE A BROOM AND DUSTPAN. Giving and extra half star just for that line because it cracked me up.
Those background people not fans of modern art huh.
I like the computer-y connecting lines between panels, and how the panels themselves are file folder-shaped, on page 3.
Hehe. The Scream while people are screaming- I see Yum Juice.
Corb: Horsies :)
The "oh fuck not my ex" vibes. Please she is here to Enjoy Art.
That horse scares me.
***MITSY***.
FUCKING CHANGES YOUR ART STYLE TO MAKE COPIES. THIS IS SO FUN I LOVE IT.
HRSHFE THE JAPANESE ONOMATOPOEIA.
YEAHHHHHHHHHHHHH CUTTING BULLETS IN HALF (in perspective no less).
CUT THE FUCKING PANEL IN HALF TOO.
The increasing escalation of "THIS FUCKS"-itude cannot describe how much I am, as the kids say, pogging.
DA-DOOF
YEAH MIETTA WE'RE SURE IT'S NOT YOUR FANTASY WISH FULFILMENT SHOUJO MANGA DREAMS HUH.
IDK WHAT ELSE TO SAY. DELICIOUS LINEART, TONES, WRITING, FIGHT CHOREOGRAPHY, COMPOSITION, HUMOUR, ART NERDERY. S TIER COMIC HOLY SHIT!!!!!
Man I cannot praise this entry enough this was a master class in comic making from you two and I haven't seen comics from either of u since W4R and they were already really good but just holyyy crap! are your drawing hands okay? did u burn a hole in your tablets drawing this much fire?. of the many things to praise definitely the usage of the time piece art as shading in the backgrounds(the drinks/newspapers/etc starting on page 11 ) is just a great great touch for so much characterization of dr dada/eisel as opponents but thats just the first part I gotta like touch on. the location of the fight is while obviously a easy choice was explored soo much and given so much depth to it I honestly think you guys must have thought up a floor plan to use the space in and felt like a real art gallery populated by npc's and such that it exist outside this one moment in time! To tie into the setting you also did a great job of having all the characters talk to each other before they even throw down and have it feel meaningful and deep and I loved that so much the conversation on how something makes you feel between Dada and Miss was so good and to see it pay off with her heart thinking about Corb and making those bishonen/bishojo shades from her heart was such a nice payoff! The relationship between dada and eisel was also really good and well established and crafted with them having a great amount of developed relationship prior to this fight. I will say I think Eisel out of the bunch felt a little less fleshed out but thats not saying enough wasnt given all! oh um lastly I think you did a spectacular job of showing off the cast full abilities and power sets in really creative perspective and panel shots so good job! wait ok also super lastly great job on giving a whole ass episode with these characters and a very funny punchline at the end. in closing great comic AMAZING fluid story and length could not wait to see mo
if spot blacks shading are your opponents specialty in these comics. then usage of humor,tone scraping,hashing and amazing colors with phenomenal galaxy brain level blending is definitely your turf! starting of you have a really good opening setup for the conflict and it checks all the boxes for getting your opponents to your characters to fight and showcases their dynamic efficiently and quickly. I do think there was a bit of a jump to Dada just being basically captured but I dont think it was worthy of dropping any points over as you still did alot with the actual fight that followed! speaking of the fight/chase it was quite comical and I absolutely love how you usage of Dada's changing skin color was so mesmerizing stacked up against the black/white/gray of the background setting ( really I absolutely love how you do colors since seeing the queen of hurts comics <3) .The goofy humor of Eisel trying to sneak around and getting blasted and jumping into the 100% natural canvas shirt were great little moments,the crowning one of him calling Dada a whore and the they are getting sapphique! made me laugh so hard. The battle was actually amazing if not a bit short but none the less had really good impact with the horrible realization from Corb that she mortally wounded her partner in crime and was a very nice way to take both characters out at the end in a believable way. In closing an amazing comic love the colors the action and the humor just was over a smidge bit to soon for how much fun I was having watching the characters duke it out. the two of you are such a dynamic duo and traded blows with your opponent very nicely!
OK, that one panel with the horse? Perfect. No notes.
But apparently I need to write another 90 words, so here's some more.
There's great expressions in this comic, used to great comedic effect. I love the detail of the ash falling from Eisel's cigarette holder on page 7. The action is stylish and kinetic (shout out to that panel that got cut in half by Corb, R.I.P), but there were a few parts where I wasn't really sure what was going on until I did a second read-through. It was fun to see the chemistry between Corb and Mietta and I think you used a good reason for Dada's elimination without going against their character to make them antagonistic.
Wow, lotta dead lesbian couples in this tourney, huh? Not that I can talk. I really liked the colours of Dada and Eisel contrasting with the black and white of the rest of the comic. I also really liked Eisel sneaking around in the background of page 3. The plot is set-up and paid off but I can't help but feel that there could be more going on other than a straight up fight. Two weeks isn't a long time to make a comic, but I think this would have benefitted from just a little more in the way of twists or interaction between the characters.
God damn this is a pretty comic, and your styles are really working together well. Lots of really cute facial expressions. Amazing action. Loved the jokes, especially all the little background ones. The caricatures and different styles were really fun! The astroboy-esque Mietta having japanese sound effects was funny. The chemistry between Corb and Mietta is really good, it feels really natural. Weird horror monster Eisel/Dada was very cool and creative, and the texture effects on it were really neat. I like how Dada got a big hero moment. Really clever use of everyone's powers. You gave all the characters a lot of personality.
Really great art here! I like how well you use backgrounds and textures/screentones to make the action pop. There's a really solid sense of where the characters are in space. The colors are gorgeous (maybe too gorgeous, I feel like it draws a bit of attention away from the black and white characters). The fight is really stylish. You do a really good job at condensing a lot of action into a few pages without things getting confusing. "Zey are getting sappique" is a really funny line. I like Eisel's cartoony expressions. I think that the way the kill happens works out really well, with Corb and Mietta being defeated cleverly but still feeling like badasses.
Overall, this was a bit confusing to follow towards the end but was a fun read. The all out style of some of the panels and pages just were a little too much as the chaos of the fight went on, but I have trouble following fight scenes a lot.
The jokes all throughout landed; the blasting through walls and the two side characters observing art to name a couple. the writing was a lot of fun. I feel it went on a smidge longer than it needed to in the later parts.
Stand out moment: horse.
But also the background poking through the visual effects that stuff is so cool.
Overall this was a little bit confusing to follow.I 'm not entire sure whats going on on page 5. It started off clear and concise but quickly I found myself confused and everything felt like it fell off the rails halfway through though I lose track of things in fight scenes easily. There are some pretty panels and I enjoyed the use of colour throughout but I only somewhat understood what was happening panel to panel.
The story itself seems to be a classic bounty hunting adventure but I feel it could have used more context and space to explore just why things are happening. That really was a bad place to open a gallery though, eh?
Stand out moment: I greatly enjoyed the "they're getting saphic" joke.
As someone familiar with this teams comic battle resume, I admittedly set a high bar of expectation upon cracking this comic reader open and by gum you two didn't disappoint. The subtle sepia 'grayscale' was a bold choice to go with when your opponents are art personified and their strengths lie in color, but by page 3 we're not only getting an art lesson, but utilizing your inks in a splendid manner to get process across but also give us a bit of an introduction on Beretta. Also its great to see a dynamic of 'team' where not only do we have a previous history, but everything is not hunky dory. Additionally! It's a nice tie in to the white gallery section the pair enter before meeting their opposition. Your interpretation of Eisel is horrifying, and I mean that in a great way. The manner of their attacks and stylization was real treat to pore over. I kept going back to the pages where they pull out caricatures of Beretta and Corb. It really sets the stage for the final boss vibes of Dada once they show up. You really embraced your opponents aesthetic and character design and made it your own. What a great match up and what a great team! Can't wait to see more (and can love bloom on the art gallery battlefield??)
I think the pair of you knew that your strengths laid in color due to your dastardly duo considering who they are and what they're made of and you used it to impressive effect :D Which isn't to say your inks are anything to sneeze at. Your spot blacks are *chefs kiss* as are your stylizations of your opponents. Its just so great to see a mutual doff of the hat given from both sides of this deathmatch. Its clear both teams gave their all! Speaking of color! Love LOVE that Dada stood out in the way they did, and wasn't just static but ever molding and changing. I still think the concept of the character is really inspired, so seeing them in action in your comic was a real treat. Your ending was explosive- literally and left me bummed there weren't more pages. What happened when the dust settled? what's the fallout? Is this a clever ploy to keep us wanting more? Whatever the case you made this vote a difficult one!
Stunning professional level layouts and art, as i'd expect from the two of you! i love the dynamic these two have; they play off of each other well and with the opponents here too. I especially loved whichever texture brush it is on eisel and dada... really popped them out of the page to look 3D and caught my eye, which is impressive with how much is going on here.
If i have any criticism its that while i got the main throughline of the comic, some details took me a couple of reads to grasp fully- mostly thinking about mietta's heart conjuring the anime corbs here, or everything being abstracted (for lack of a better term) by dada the first time. All of the information was in the comic- i can't fault you guys there- but making it a little more clear in future rounds would be fantastic.
please keep using horse jpeg i love horse jpeg
That one page 9 panel (you know the one) might? be my fave of all the comics from this round? There were some really good smash cut jokes in this one that had me laughing the whole way through. (is that dada in the family guy death pose. good lord). I loved them for the humour but it did translate into the writing a bit- some parts were a bit abrupt, and if you guys go forward i'd love to see a little bit more spaced out pacing. Know that while i say this i'm also looking directly at the camera because i know what time crunch does to us all though, haha.
This is also personal preference but im not as fond of self sacrifice in a death tournament- lemme see some murder!
Wow, what a stellar comic. The work you two did in this is amazing. Plenty of jokes, excellent action, and very beautiful looking artwork has everything come together to make a fantastic whole. I love how you managed to balance out so much of this with grayscale as well as how stark your black and white inkwork is in this. I really can only heap praise for this one, because you really took the cake in this collab. I love everything about it and I can not wait to see what you end up doing in the future. Fantastic work.
You both did such great work on this comic. This was a super great read and I really love both of your characters. They're so weird and interesting and your comic was a lot of fun. It's been a while, so I forgot how much I really enjoy the work you both do. The expression work (and body language) was well done and really shined through with this comic. The story was a lot of fun and was also amusing. I really think both of your characters have great personalities. I really want to see more comics with you two working on them in the future, because you made a great pairing on it. I seriously hope to see more from you both soon. Great work!
Ninja
woah woah woah you goober, you just changed the spotblacks i did on my pages to grey
Comment posted: February 6th, 2024 at 9:06 PM
Prometheus
Oh yeah Thumbs n Writing by me and Coloring fully done by Ninjamas, i did the grey shading and we split the Lineart!! if it wasnt obvs hehehe
Comment posted: February 6th, 2024 at 9:04 PM