Oculama

I think this was a good management of your time. Your linework is clearer and more defined than I've seen in your previous work and everything in full color makes everything stand out. Working with paralleled events with the girls fangirling and their object of attention going about his day was a neat contrast as well.
If I had notes it'd be more post production polishing. Getting rid of your sketch lines, adjusting your page levels so content on the next page of your sketchbook isn't showing up behind the work. I'm puzzled as to why your gutterspace is significantly large. To the point I fear your paneling comes off as so constrained, even your word bubbles and features feel like something we have to squint to get a good look at. I'd recommend cropping that and ensuring your panels are getting the most space for best featuring.

I can totally sympathize with ambitions and feeling you can push it, but, It seems by way of deadline, with this timeframe four pages seems to be your sweet spot. I hope you take this into your next battle and dedicate yourself to putting out the best four pages with a contained tale. You'd be surprised the neat things artists can present when given limitations! :) You have some pretty good quality starting out- you've even leaned into adding some elements of background for us to get a sense this is a convention of sorts. I would encourage you to lean into that featuring. Having an establishing shot of the buildings, or perhaps a featured poster of our star of the hour and an empty signing booth would've better driven what you were trying to say better than having the characters outright say it. While comics DO have dialogue, the 'showing' element of sequential work is also important.

This was clearly an effort above your previous ones and it really shows. You didn't skimp on anything and this really felt like something that was at the top of your game here. For the most part, a lot of my critique goes towards just taking the time to improve your abilities. Whether that's merely spending more time getting your anatomy and posing tighter via practice with life drawing, or working with improving your own linework. That being said, if you can keep on providing quality of this level, you're going to do well. Your story was a nice side-story to the tournament run. It kept it so while they didn't interact or meet with each other, there was that connection and that made for a good slice of life for these two. An excellent effort. Good work!

I quite liked the escalation to this comic. It was a nice side story and really had the feeling of something that still fit within the canon of Death Games and Todd & Danny's story. I liked how you had the two of them interacting, which really helps explain their characters more. On the whole this was a nice little comic. Artwise, it's a shame you were unable to get more in-depth beyond line art, but I really do think those sketchy blacks are doing favors for your work. Keep on going with those. Keep practicing your anatomy up! Good work!

Mr Apotheosis - What a cute slice of life comic! And it's interesting seeing what Marybelle thought of DANNY from her point of view. That said, the pages do need a bit of cleaning up all around. Perhaps digitally drawing the rectangular panels could've given the pages a more finished look. . Bonus points for using colors though! I love the contrast between Marybelle's and Todd's scenes. One is bright and lively and the other quite the opposite. They mirror their personalities which I thought was pretty cool.

Rhanny - Well..that escalated quickly! Not gonna lie, even though the premise/setup is something I expected from these two, I did not foresee what Marybelle's reaction would be if she met Todd instead of DANNY. But it makes sense considering her personality. I love the dialogue between Todd and Danny on page 3 because of how real it is on all accounts. It's a shame that the latter pages weren't finished, I would've loved to see that fight scene in all its glory!

A nice quick look into your character's life. I'm surprised they didn't directly interact with Todd but I like what you did with him. While it was a little hard to follow the art, I still found it charming and the story enjoyable. Some of the dialogue felt disconnected like there was supposed to be a sentence that would connect the conversation but it went missing, it still felt believable but just a little unnatural at times.

It looks like you had a lot planned with this character and it's nice to see that you were able to put some of it into this battle. This comic does raise a lot of unanswered questions that could possibly lead into a future comic but the question is if Todd and/or Danny will be at the forefront of this or will he become a side character. It's a shame the fight at the end was incomplete but I'm glad to see you working on more action. This is more of a personal opinion but it might be worth experimenting with different fonts as some stuck out way more than others and it does get a little distracting when everyone has a different font when a unique font is usually reserved for someone with an accent or to project a certain personality.