Oculama

Q is a really fascinating looking guy! It's a shame that time pressure got to you, because his design is very evocative and I liked the set-up you were doing, immediately establishing a believable relationship between the contestants. I hope to see more of your stuff around the tracks; PH and I were really hoping we'd get to battle given our similar ideas and we hope to see more of you, and Q! Deuces. - CSJ

Hail to the king(fisher)! I had a bit of difficulty deciding what to think of your comic at first. It was clear throughout that you had a consistent plan and managed your time across the whole comic effectively. There are times when the presentation of dialogue felt blocky and crowded though the script itself was solid; perhaps split it across more scenes to keep the size of those speech bubbles in-check, or rephrase things more succinctly? I also feel you may have held back visually in order to maintain that consistency, but it's a sound (and successful) approach.

I encourage you to consider creative 'scars' for your contestants going forward; consider what kind of change to a character might be useful to its author in developing it further in future comics, based on their personality and identity. Not always easy for a R1 where there's less material to work from, but I know you have that creativity in you! - CSJ

Very fun round. I very much enjoyed the start, having Kingfisher be so fascinated with human fishing techniques and the concept of catch and release is a really good character moment. I thought you wrote everyones birds very well, they are all very cute and charming in this. I wonder how much a texture of some sort would add to the comic, maybe add a bit of screen tones to add some extra oumph. It does get a little flat in some panels, I have that same problem myself so I notice it a bit more, you might want to add some darker shadows or spot blacks to try and combat that. Either way very fun comic. I did enjoy that final punchline very much. Great job!

Ah is what it is. Glad you submitted what you did have and from what you did submit I could tell it was going to be nice. There's something about that first page that has so much charm to it. The exhale panel is great, I would have added some of that smoke spiral puffyness to the onomatopoeia itself. Would have pushed that an extra little bit of damn thats nice. And on the same page Kingfisher hitting that damn is so funny. Something about the simpleness of the lines while also just being very nicely done is just so funny. Like that's a whole ass bird man. Hope you have an easier time next time and we get to see you at full power. Great job with what you;ve submitted!

Nice consistent style all the way through, very legible. Of course Kingfisher would be KING with subjects as well and that he'd go fishing. I like how Q is just a grumpy neighbor that got caught up in things, and Mori being a special specimen makes a lot of sense with the scientists chasing them. Easily able to see the scars for your opponents! The final punchline of Mori not being able to fly was excellent. Subirb, even.

I really enjoyed your stylization of the characters on the more finished pages, but it's harder to follow the action on the sketchier ones. I dunno if it was a deliberate choice or it worked out that way but having the page where Q is tripping balls and the only legible thing is "FUK" made me crack up. The highlight of the footprints and swirly eyes definitely helped identify the scars on the last page. A lil surprised chest compressions helped with a stab wound - the stab itself would also work as a scar!

The story is largely clear, its hard to really tell what's happening in the bottom half of page 2, but it's clear Q is freaking out. I like the contrast of the concept being the birds getting high but suddenly one gets basically murdered, made me chuckle. I think the scar in The King of Fisher's case is pretty clear, but not too apparent in Q since its more like a status effect than a permanent scar, unless he's just permanently freaked out.
The bird's body shapes and faces get really expressive and page 3 has some nice strong contrast.

I love The King of Fisher's monologuing lol. I like how the opponents are all doing their own thing and cross paths, the setting and characterizations are all solid and are a good look into what everyone's deal is. Central Park is a cool setting to have too!
Everything is readable and easy to understand on the first read, I think my only note is that I wish there was a bit more detailed scenery in the park, but honestly thats a nice to have, and I really like what you got here!

This was a really solid comic dude!
You did a really good job balancing screen time between everyone, and it was a neat little story!
The panel layout worked really well and was well paced. Your greys were very nice and everything read very clearly, especially with so much action going on.

any critiques I'd have are pretty minor or nit picky, I think you did a really good job with this one. Well done dude!

This gave me a good chuckle. This was a very fun read.
you always have such great expressions and really dynamic poses in your comics. You do fast pacing really well, too.
I would have liked to see everything at least inked, but I get life happens. (I also really do like seeing peoples pencils/Thumbs. A sneak peak)
On the pages you did have lined, I thought your shapes were really nice and everything read very easily.

Thank you for the read!

This Kingfisher is such a know it all. I love that you decided to keep him smol. It makes all the hijinks they get up to that much more hilarious. Getting inspired by an idea for rescue by watching human fishers and getting WAY too cerebral about it is just the sort of thing that makes your opponents rankling reaction all the more amusing. Haha, poor Mori. How long are they gonna be stuck up there?
This was a wonderful introduction and opportunity to slap us with who your bird is and what they're about while still giving your opponents their flowers. Well done

Haha, I really shouldn't be laughing so hard at getting so high you freak out and stab a store customer, but I am- I totally didn't expect that. XD Even with your sketch pages, the dynamism and flow of movement isn't lost. I especially got a chuckle out of going airborne with concern as Mori says "Dont die!"
While you couldn't polish this off as you liked, there are some gems in here. I especially love the self indulgent heavy inhale panel before it just bleeds out into that self satisfied blow of smoke. Really great stuff!

So are we seeing the origins of the legendary king fisher here? How he became who he will be? great premise given what we know of the character outside the Bird Wars! Neat as that idea is, it seems like you had a little trouble integrating your opponents deeper in that; I'd have liked to see more diverse scar ideas, maybe even scars based off fishing (like cuts from the net). Something to consider for next round possibly!

So I'm pretty sure after a couple flips back and forth in the pages I understand what I'm looking at in the incomplete pages, at least; the comedy of this comic does feel like it relies a lot on the visuals, since your character and line work is so strong and vibrant, I feel like if you managed to completely finish this comic it would have looked and felt much more hilarious. I like the promise of the premise at least

Really cute comic and surprisingly good looking for the week! I quite like this interpretation of Kingfisher being very true to the character while also keeping everyone as a normal bird! While the scar was a little simple, I actually think it was handled very well on your end. It'll be interesting to see how you progress into the next round, but I can't wait to see how the King learns on improving their fishing skills! Great work!

One weekers are hard, but you're well aware of that. I really love how you drew Q - so super expressive and that opening page is just oozing with a ton of character. Mori is also very cute - I'm hoping we see more of her down the line. I know these things usually die when no deadline is met, but I would love to see this comic finished in some form. If not that, I'd like to see you do some more with them at some point. Good try!

Ooh I didn’t know you can fish in Central Park, that’s my fun fact for the day AHAHA
Firstly, I loved the dialogue in this round! Not only did it feel like birds talking, but it was really fun (the beginning already had me laughing with the bird tourist (yeah, who likes tourist, go tell them Q)). Also loved how you had a lot of different angles in the comic - perspective can get repetitive when the characters in the comic are small, but I think the round had really good diversity which made it fun to read! Now time to go catch Mori for the zoo before they find a way off that roof. . .

Smoking birds - my favorite kind!
I love my anthropomorphic stories so this was a fun round to read! Love the outfits everyone has and how you drew them. (Omg the Pigeon has a knife)
The art was fun to read and easy to follow too, even in the more sketchier pages! (Though the second page sketchiness did add to the ’wasted’ feeling so it felt deliberate, so apologies if I am calling the deliberate pages ‘sketchier’ asdf) Overall loved the round and getting the feeling that the birds have their own little jobs and suffering over shifts, just like us. . .!

This was cute! a good characterization of your opponents birds, they all had stuff to do in the comic, the linework was clear and readable. A quick tip for you about your word bubbles, on some pages i noticed the edges of the text bubbles getting very close to the panel borders leaving a very small gap between them, a general rule is that you want your word bubbles to be as far from the edge of the panel border as the panel borders are as far from eachother, and if the word bubbles get too large they should absorb the panel border and leave no gap, it makes things look a bit neater.

What is here is nice, I like the posing on the birds in the panels that are fully rendered. Where it gets sketchy, unfortunately, it's not just that its unfinished but that is not legible to me, and I ultimately don't really know what you were going for here, if you had just done 2 finished pages instead of 2 finished and 2 unfinished it may have been a bit clearer, but that's just my opinion.

This was a cute and fun comic to read! The interactions are fun and felt natural. You handled scarring your opponents pretty well. I really like the personality of King Fisher. It's fun to see this as a potential origin story for him learning the joys of fishing. The humor was also spot on I hope to see more of King Fisher's antics. Good work on this comic I'd like to see you push for even better quality in the future!

Even with the unfinished are the pages you got out still have a great stylistic way of drawing all the birds. It's funny to see kingfisher in all his glory. The scars were well depicted it was a good choice to ink them out on the sketch page as well. The interaction was pretty abrupt and was a bit hard to follow though I did get the gist of it. Good luck with your future comics!

Simple, punchy comic! I like how the story presents the concept of "catch and release" in fishing only for it to come back later at the end (in a literal way). The eye scratch scars felt a tad too uncreative to me tho. I feel like with the two being trapped in the net, there were other opportunities for other kinds of scars (ex. what if a part of the net got stuck on Q's foot? It's how pigeons commonly lose their toes; by their feet getting wrapped in things like hair or nets)

Silly, fun comic! There wasn't much going story-wise, and most of the art was incomplete, but the scars were pretty creative (Kingfisher with the stab scars and Q being permanently high). I feel like a bit more set up would've helped understand what is going on in the story better; because as it is, it just feels like they're getting high in one moment and then we're randomly at the store in the other. Just food for thought.