Trigger warning:
blood and dismemberment
Due to other life things going on I could not finish the colouring in time, but it will be very soon! Enjoy!
Voting is closed.
These two pages are beautifully done, and the emotion injected therein feels impressively sincere, given the lack of a greater context for what's happening. I do feel, however, that this comic is wanting for more of that context. I really am on the fence about just giving this comic credit for what it is versus what's unsaid, and I think there's a context where that credit is due, but in a tournament where we've an obligation to do right by our opponent's characters as much as our own, this feels a bit lacking. All that said, it's still a terrific work of pathos, and I think you should be extremely proud of what you've put together. The art is soft, but the violence is unblunted and stark, and that's not easy to pull off. Great work!
I'm impressed with how well you tell this story in basically five panels. It's a bold move that works well for the action depicted. The essence of each character comes across w/o needing to do a particularly deep dive on either, with Hydrent in particular coming across as a real piece of work. I do think one of these pages could have been broken up a bit to make this seem like a less one-sided confrontation; your opponent is given precious little agency here, to the disservice of both characters. Your artwork really fits the big panels however, as the bold colors and clear layouts make the ship feel appropriately larger than life.
REVIL-0-
What a neat spaceship design. It's great you pushed the envelope from the usual metal tube we're used to seeing. You drop us right in the heart of the action at a tense stand off, which I'm here for! I think its a good idea to do away with set up if you have a decent hook like this.
I think if I had any notes, I wish there had been more time and dialogue between the characters to get to know them better. Because as it stand, we're glutted by way of the stakes and action, but I admittedly don't know Bouba or Hydrent beyond their brief words. Still though, way for Hydrent to choose the chaotic option with that airlock. Hardcore!.
M.JELLY-
What a different direction to take a battle, and clever to boot. Melancholy, pensive and ending in an apology for their hubris. What a fascinating way to portray a conflict at its smoldering end. I think your inks and subtle grayscale help enhance that somber mood as well. Leaves me wondering how much of this comic was intent, or just happy accident. Either way is valid though!
I know you posted this way ahead of time for the community to enjoy well before the deadline timer. I'll be curious to see if this affects the reception or the anticipation of your readership.
The panels where you had enough time to color look really nice! I think you have a good grasp on how to use camera angles to make cool looking shots. I like the design of the ship too.
The second page where you use a thinner line weight for the characters looks a little weird compared to the thick lines in the rest of the comic? It would be cool to see you experiment with using multiple line weights I think!
I really like it when someone is willing to make their character an evil jerk. I think Hydrent (accidentally?) blowing his own people into space was funny.
The art here is very cute! I love how sweet the expressions are here. Your shading looks nice too. It really contributes to the bleakness here.
It feels like Hydrent is out of character here? Also it feels weird to me to have them dying without any explanation of how that happened. It's kind of dark for the sake of being dark?
Bouba is very cute and comforting and I like her weird way of talking. The quiet landscape cutaway at the end was a good way to end the comic. I like how you make things very brutal and gory without actually showing a lot of gore.
I am not entirely sure how to approach this, I like how experimental you tried to make your shots for each page with a good variety of angles that do really help the comic read, but the biggest problem and one I may suggest asking for help with from other artist is actually making panels for comic because each page you used is technically a splash page, I am honestly impressed how clear the comic is regardless. But I think with a little work of paneling to really flesh out your pacing I think you will do great things once you get a little more comfortable with comics!
This is a really cute comic and I love Bouba and how he talks it puts a smile on my face and its really hard to critique on this comic because there honestly isnt a lot to critique. I really wish there was more here or why any of this is happening, this comic seems to try to jump straight to the emotional punch with no set up. what is there is nice I just wish there had been more but sometimes that is all that can be done, I hope in the future we can see you use your 5 pages to the fullest because whats there is already really good!
Bouba you pure soul! There's plenty of (possibly sardonic) emotion delivered in just two pages. The setting is suitably desolate, and the brutality is visceral.
I'll levy a similar criticism of your opponents comic for yours, in that I don't feel we get a good establishing shot of either character! Bouba is shown exclusively from behind, and Hydrent is mangled and difficult to recognize. Considering where we begin in the story, another page or two showing the preceding events would help me get invested in what's happening.
I feel you could be more intentional with your shading as well to create clearer contrast between our characters and the backgrounds. Introduce some darker greys for Hydrent to and near-whites for Bouba to offset them!
Short and sweet! This is a Looney Tunes setup and payoff we've seen many times before, and there's nothing wrong with a classic.
Even with a simple premise, there are a lot of ways you could expand on this that would've been interesting to see. The uncolored pages aside, it would've been nice to see more detailed interiors of the ship. Likewise I don't feel we get a proper look at any of our characters - a few long shots and super closeups. Again, even with just five panels there's plenty of opportunity to play with the visuals! Time constraints I'm sure played into it, so if you go back and polish this I would consider this.
I love me some space shenanigans. The art is really cute but I think one panel per page is a bit too big. Most of the time it is used for showcasing big moments for instance introducing a character or just something you really want to highlight or a big moment in a comic. The first and last pages were perfect examples of that IMO. Hydrent is pretty ruthless lol and I kinda like that about him tbh. I hope Bouba is okay though! (I think she will be cos she's pretty resilient from what I read). Also those poor space men, RIP -_-.
Holy moly... Did you two plan this story? This looks like a continuation or aftermath of Revil's side =O Really wish we got more context of what happened but it's really weird how the two comics seemed connected. Despite the lack of backstory on how things got to the way they were, I felt really bad for both of these characters. I refuse to believe they died here. I want to see more of them! =O The art is actually pretty appealing. It's rough around the edges but it works. The jagged cracks around the crater looked really well done.
I like the cartoony evilness of that dastardy lizard creature. And I loved the punchline of him messing up and spacing all of them! A funny little gag, and honestly I think it was executed well in terms of pacing and sticking punchline. Artwise, I'd just suggest you keep practicing, perhaps look into perspective and how to vary your line art. Other then that, I suggest just working on anatomy and posing, as well as just looking at enviroments nad try to draw more details to give a sense for the space around them.
I hope to see more from you!
Artwise, this comic has some good angles and the little detail about the crater helps sell the impact. I'm not entirely sure what happened? Is this a continuation of the others comic, or is it just a coincidence. Its clearly a intriguing premise, but I'd have loved to see some glimpses as to the reason of the poor creatures pain and suffering. As it were, I feels like we were given the ending to a story or the start of a flashback arc. Generally speaking, when you start a story with someone allready beaten, its to start a timeline that leads up that very moment. Something to consider!
I like this. It has like cryingcats.mp4 kind of energy. Like that skidaddle skidoodle kinda like woosh to it. It has that sparkly energy that is very much so helped by the humor of it all. The art has a good kind of chunkiness to it and the bold pages of low panel count really make it seem like badoink as a comic and I love that. It's simple and straight to the point in it's delivery. The characterizations that are seen are very good and clear for being such a low panel count comic and I think that's a really special skill to make happen.
Holy spit what the flip. This comic like punches you in the head. How did I become emotionally attached to these two cretins? And how did this story perfectly pick up in harmony with Revil's? This is a magic comic and it's art style really hits you with that simple and clean you wa shock kapow. Like I feel bad for these little guys now, they really just get flooped in such a simple and impressive feat of writing and characterization with what little we know about these creatures and the implications and work that the reader has to make, and it's just like "man." like Man...
Oh oh no this got so dark so fast I was expecting some light cartoon humor but I was tricked this is that dark humor stuff my mother warned me about! great comic I am a bit lost at the lack of text for on the 1st page but I think its fine since the majority of the comic happens in a few seconds. I am a bit confused as to what was going on for a second once I read up on hydrent I believe his course of action is very in-line with his character and was quite humorous for being quickly morbid lol.
Gosh your artistic skill is quite good here over just 2 pages! very great job showing the aftermath of the battle in such a short but very intimate way I can imagine it was something reallly crazy but I would have liked to see how that got there to that point. Its interesting that both you and your opponents both went to the climax of the conflict without showing the start of it but it does feel like it wasnt necessary in both cases since the game of cat and mouse comes to ahead in the comic and such a bold/somber way. Also I love bouba's design as a character and look forward to seeing more of them
Rivana
I swear you two planned this =O!
Comment posted: August 14th, 2022 at 3:01 PM
CornOfTheBreads
These two feel like they are the same story and that Hydrant just threw himself out of his ship as Bouba floats down to talk to him...
Comment posted: August 14th, 2022 at 12:04 AM
Piñata
Mooom, the adorable animals are fighting! @w@;;
Comment posted: August 8th, 2022 at 1:50 AM