Oculama

Writing this as I read the comic, forgive the stream of consciousness style of review.
I super enjoy the sketchy art right off the bat, it's a very solid and considered art style, I think. Characterful! I like your interactions. I think the jokes land well, but there isn't much story to be seen. This is no doubt due to the length of the comic, and nothing else, I know the both of you can tell a great story. I would have loved to see more of it. Framing the characters in a jail, and just sort of talking about how they got there, is a good start Your ending is fun, leaving much up for interpretation. Your panel layouts are great, I like that you use the panel borders partially as environment. That being said, your simple art style takes away from the story sometimes. It is hard to tell exactly where everyone is at any time, because of the lack of backgrounds. There's no sense of scale or dimensionality. Going forward, please try to include more backgrounds in your artwork, it will vastly improve your work.

Writing this as I read, forgive any formatting weirdness of the review.
First off: LOVE the VHS intro. Super fun framing of this comic being a TV show. However, I could do with less intro/title pages. The "previously on" is super good for your comic to just start in the middle of the battle. I think you should let your opponents' characters play a bit more before you kill off one of them. Your cops and robbers dynamic is really good, but this comic really isn't a versus comic, it's just a collaborative comic with two extra guys inserted because you had to. I actually had to go back to the 'previously on' segment to double check if you mentioned the reason for Koschei and Violence to be there in the first place (no doubt because of the halted way I write this review, but no matter). Seeing the kid get turned into a sword, with no prior real introduction or interaction between the characters, does not leave the reader feeling any empathy for what's going on, you simply do not know (and therefore care about) the characters experiencing tragedy. I think your narrative is fine, but your character interactions really suffer, it does not feel like this comic was writted with the opponent matchup in mind. Your art is really good, and I don't notice any art style switches between the two of you, assuming you both did an equal amount of work. To improve going further: try to properly introduce your characters. It is fine to have the "recap", but it's not a replacement for actual character writing. More sound effects would be good too, if you decide to keep the cartoon style. There is no way in hell these sci-fi gadgets and fights don't make any noise.

Wowee this one's got a lot of great stuff going on! Killer attacks! Abounding brutality! That special yearning between predator and prey!

I loved the full color on this comic - very even-keeled throughout. It's got those 90s anime colors that really sell the feel I'm guessing you wanted to cultivate.

There were a few points I would have liked a bit more clarity on - the dialogue seemed to hint that Satraxia knew either Violence or Koschei, but it wasn't clear enough for me to be sure if that was a bit of background building or just vague word choice in her dialogue.

Big fan of using the photo as a framing device for the intro - my only note there would be that I'd love to see something on the screen more salient to your own characters, if you get the opportunity to take another stab at it. Also wrt the framing, I appreciate how you used muted colors for the "last week on" portion of the intro, and then switched to more vibrant colors once you were back in the real time of the show. A small but appreciable touch.

Story was a fun read, and felt very broad-strokes as far as not digging into any of the characters' specific motivations or actions leading up to this, beyond the well-established catch-me-if-you-can dynamic that Satraxia and Jade have going on. This served the comic well, I think, as you were able to drive through a lot of intense action without your pace ever getting bogged down. We *Could* have gotten more about what Koschei and Violence were about, but as far as this story needed, we got just the right amount of them.

The deaths you executed for your opponents' OCs are some of my favorites, if not THE favorites of this round for me. The brutality of them, coupled with how naturally they happen over the course of the action, are both points in both of your favors as far as showing your expertise at the comic game.

Loved your characters, as well. Whether we see more of them in rounds to come or not, I can tell their dynamic is a fun one to play with. Tremendous work, and please get some rest this week!

less isn't always more, but in this case, I can confidently say y'all packed in a truly admirable amount of quality into 6 short pages.

There's hardly a wasted beat in your storytelling, and the nigh-oblivious flirting you have Jade and Satraxia engage in is absolutely delightful. That Koschei and Violence float at the periphery of the story up to (and almost including the end is wonderfully funny in its own way.

And my goodness, THE FACIAL EXPRESSIONS. I feel like I could go on a whole review on how well you sell thsi story by the characters' mugs alone. Satraxia's chultz-esque despair at her imprisonment, Jade's many, many smug smiles at having got her (huge alien wo) man, Koschei's old man chill-face, Violence's sardonic grimaces...all absolute gold, and no small part of this comic's appeal, all capped off of course by the wonderful pop-eyed fear in Jade and Satraxia before Koschei makes them like unto pancakes.

I love the composition of that final panel too. The Merry melodies-style cartoon death descending upon your opponnents' OCs while they stand there regularly proportioned to the overhead view of them moments before disaster is a great juxtaposition.

My biggest gripe with this comic is that the ending feels just a bit too...unanchored? The death blow, while amusing, doesn't quite feel earned, and while I'm no hater of random cartoon violence, I feel like I would have appreciated a little...something? in the body of the story itself to either set up the blow, or make its occurrence feel like more of a payoff.

It is, regardless, a very fitting way to end the whole amusing (and seemingly inconsequential up to the end) jailhouse exchange. Like a dialogue punctuated by sudden and brutal violence, you get a great gut-punch in on the reader, albeit one engineered to evoke a laugh.

Nicely done, and hope you are both resting over this interlude week. Shine on diamonds!

First off: well done on the art. Readable action, good lighting, significantly more off-putting shot of a naked dude getting his skull pulped than I expected.

Narrative-wise, Koschei and Violence seem a bit undercooked; neither of them gets to show much of a personality outside of righteous indignation at their partner's death. There's nothing wrong with centering Satraxia's conflict with Jade, but more effort could have gone into making their opponents more unique and distinct than the cannon fodder.

There are also missing commas on pages 4 and 7 that threw me off, though I wouldn't call that a game-breaker.

Still, strong comic overall.

Though the lineart character designs are extremely charming, the lack of any background features besides the cell bars was quite distracting. I know the environment doesn't end up playing much of a role but them floating in a void isn't to the comic's favor.

The punchline, while amusing, doesn't quite make up for the lack of meat beforehand. The banter between Jade and Satraxia is decent enough, but Koschei is essentially a non-entity in his own comic and Violence doesn't fare much better.

Overall, a bit too insubstantial and not quite funny enough to compensate. A lot more could have been done with the characters involved.

Respectable work! Producing something of consistent quality start to finish, in full colour, is no mean feat! It gives a really nice coherence to the story, and punches up your action work with the cool special effects. I loved seeing all the action/onscreen death (hell yea hell yeah), and I also really liked the 'title card' screen, I definitely heard the pokemon tv show trumpets looking at it, it really leans into your character's vibe. There is a lot of focus on Satraxia (who i absolutely adore jsyk)-- her motives, her attitude, her approach to Jade, even killing the opponents to piss Jade off is a very characterizing move for her. She's a huge fun personality and one of my favourite combatants in this tourney. It's great!

However, it kind of feels like the other characters screen time got sidelined to make room for Satraxia, which was a bit of a shame. There's elements of the others in there-- the little tears on sword-violence as he's fighting Jade, Koschei's reaction to his death, but these moments aren't really explored beyond the scope of one or two panels. I actually think Jade loses out the most; she's mostly reactionary and I didn't really have much sense of her personality. It might be nice in the future to see her interact with the opponents and build some rapport, or get a peek into her inner world a bit.

I did really like the way you chose to frame the deaths here-- violence dying because he broke, koschei going out like the old master defending his student-- really fun and satisfying. I'm excited to see how Jade and Satraxia's enmity develops, and i think they have a really fun and promising dynamic. Nice work!!

This was super fun and had some really enjoyable character moments! I really like the economical and bold art style and love the gestural feel of the linework. Particularly on the early pages, I think you were judicial in your use of spot greys and they work in a very balanced way-- the first page in particular is really strong. Also I'm a big panel nerd, and I really like how you played with the prison bars to break up the panels on your pages. Clever use of the space!

I think the strength of this comic is in seeing the characters bounce off of each other--Satraxia and Violence especially had the start of a good business relationship there, but if felt like I had a sense of everyone at least a little. Maybe Koschei lost out a little bit, due to having so few lines. My biggest criticism is the lack of any real action or motivation within the story itself-- it feels like this is just a snippet of a longer story. Adding a complication , even in the form of a gag, could have given this the narrative push to make it super solid despite its short length. I think all the other elements were here, in one form or another!

Also i fucking loved your banner guys I lost my shit when I saw it. your gags are great 10/10

Very good coloring and finished pages that give it a very nice and holistic feel however i cannot say i enjoyed it as much as i would like to say i would because it simply did not use the other characters as much as it felt like it should have.

Maybe this is just my personal view on OCT comics and what "Peak OCT Comic" looks like but it ideally should share the screen time far more evenly than it does here (usually leaning towards the opponents because of the nature of making a round FOR your opponent), which did sour my enjoyment of an otherwise wonderful comic.

If this were not an OCT match it would have been pretty good, but it does go to spoil some of the narrative weight of the deaths.

As said in the review above with Throbgob and Footini, the ideal OCT comics usually spend even amounts of time with their opponent and on their own characters, but on the spectrum of problems i would have with any given OCT round, if you were making your own round against an opponent and include your own characters LESS to shine a light on your OPPONENT'S Dynamic, i can not fault that as much as not involving opponents.

And all though the ending was abrupt and cut the comic a bit short, i felt like there was enough of your opponents and enough effective humor that made me want to read this comic again anyways!

Oh, sick way to do exposition and speedrun the setup! And the blurry background behind the title screen too so you've got the establishing shot squared away without having to add too much detail because we've "seen it last episode".

I'm imagining Dragon Ball crusty old anime audio with the pew pew sound effects right now.

RIP Violence. I feel like your opponents are kinda overshadowed by your characters, but the evil relationship between Satraxia and Jade is quite fun. Compelled by this duo that hates each other and if y'all survive this round I look forwards to seeing more kills from being caught in the crossfire between them!

GRIOSHFOSEHOFIESAW STARTING OFF IN GAY BABY JAIL. I love how magnificently fluffy y'all drew Satraxia's mane of hair.

BIG HAMMER. Are you sure having his whole ass out was the only crime Koschei was responsible for, because he can at least add two murders to the list now. *remembers his character page* I don't think two is the correct number.

Big respect for Just Doing The Murder in The Murder Tournament and also the efficient page count!

I'm not quite clear on why Violence was buttering up Satraxia, trying to jump ship from Koschei? On the other hand, her big personality and Heated Drama Between Women really steals the show.

The Writing and artwork of this tale gave me great nostalgic memories of waking up saturday mornings to catch the latest episodes of Dragon Ball Z on Television, it had action and mad-cap zaniness of DBZ Abridged with some Space Police Tenchi Muyo GXP mix, which made for some fun reading. The Artwork was fun and easy to follow and I did enjoy your use of colors and limited shading on these pages, though I would like to see a bit more in the ending but perhaps its best to leave us wanting more at times, together I can see you two go very far in this tournament, I look forward to reading the further adventures of these characters.

Your Comic was also quite entertaining as well, though I would have liked to see a bit of color in these pages or maybe some grey tones, not too much as ambitious as the other entry, this comic was still a pleasant read. Though I felt Violence the Kid and Koshchei were a mere after thought almost in this tale, which had me wondering if Koshchei is named after the famous Russian folktales of Koshchei The Immortal, The Deathless, If he was that would definately open up this character with such rich lore to further explore in future comics, I also like to learn more about Violence, These are interesting characters that I want to read more of, I think in the end I just really wanted more out of this comic, is what I'm saying.

I very strong first entry! you did a fantastic job of capturing the feel of 90-2000s anime episodic story telling and presentation and it works super super well for the Jade and Satraxia you can tell they've been at this for a little while now and you have the actions and dialogue to back the two of their dynamic up quite neatly. that being said your opponents dont actually seem to get as much dialogue to explain them being there. The panel explaining the power/team is wonderful its got that single shot eye catcher presentation of a action movie which is what I assume you were going for there and it does well to explain who they are and how they got there perfectly. Just past that they kinda just become set pieces for a fight between Jade and Satraxia ; Violence just gets sword moded and broken and the koschei gets knocked out and then wakes up just long enough to get killed off. Still a great comic overall with the action and brutality of Satraxia on full display just a little more of some dialogue from your opponents would have made this a perfect comic.

oh pengogo and budd you two make the cutest Friggin comics I swear lol. this is no exception while like your opponents comic I think a panel or 2 of explaining how jade managed to capture Satraxia would have been a great addition to the comic it wasn't absolutely necessary as u gave them plenty of banter that bounced well off each other for the most part. but as with the other comic I kinda wish we were given more insight on your team the bio for both characters feels like they should have a really Vitriolic Best Buds type relationship but they dont really say any dialogue between the two. That being said the ending made me giggle so hard just off the faces alone and the morbid humor of impending death by mallet. I feel like either an extended beginning or a slightly extended ending( I know time is a cruel unforgiving mistress) would have worked super well as I was just begging for more dialogue between the 4 of these characters after only having just met them so to speak. still mad entertaining <3

I really like how this is set up like an old 90's serial anime. You offered a fully coloured and shaded comic, which given the time to work with is no small feat, and many panels have backgrounds in addition. Most of the focus is on Satraxia and Jade, with Violence and Koschei being accessories (albeit useful accessories) to their story. With a short but polished comic it can be difficult to add much more to the plot, but I think you'd have done well to give a little more dialogue and time to your opponent's characters so they feel like more than side characters in Jade and Satraxia's story.

There's a lot of charm in this comic with it's cutesy style and thick charcoal lines. I love Koschei getting water tossed on his claims of villainy and Violence getting all smoozey with Satraxia, buttering her up for a contract. You used your opponent's characters to good effect and had the character's hubris let Koschei and Violence get the drop on them. It's a short comic with a simple plot, but executed effectively and with good characterisation. I wonder if you could have had Korschei interact with the other characters a bit more though, as it is he has the short end of the stick.

Man, y'all had me at the comic banner. I knew once I looked at both teams we were in for a comedic treat and you didn't disappoint. Giving a nod to your Dragonball Z-esque starlets was clever. But first- execution and technicals. Love LOVE your method of coloring for this first round. But I am admittedly a sucker for desaturated palettes. You seemed to have brushed up against utilizing spot blacks that i wish was carried over from panel to panel overall. You always have some pretty fantastical energy blasts and attacks that are devoid of sound effects. You handled your page and panel real estate really well that there is actually room for said SFX so I'm puzzled as to why they weren't plugged in to add an extra oomph to these impacts and attacks- especially the breaking of the demon sword on page 8. I would've loved to have seen what a demonic weapon breaking sounds like. Speaking of effects, the energy blast and scoot back on the bottom of page 6 has to be my favorite! Simple thing, but it really telegraphs we're getting down and dirty as we turn the page

Such think chonky inks! For a black and white comic, this was a great stylization definitely gives your pages a nice sense of charm. If I had any notes, I wish there was a manner to 'polish' this in a way that makes it look more final and print ready if that makes sense. By way of story, it was really charming! You had a clever use of the panel on page 2 with Satraxia holing on to the comic panel in a manner that telegraphs its the jail cell bars, as well as using panel breaks on the bottom of page four to evoke the cell as well. That's all very inspired! The story is short and sweet which I think is a frugal use of such a tight deadline. I am definitely left wanting more, but also wished for an add on of elements such as sound effects for your action panels. Still all in all great teamwork by the both of you- this comic looks so seamless I wouldn't of guessed it was done by two people!

You guys have a fun setup with this pair being mortal enemies. I'll be curious to see what the formula looks like in later rounds, if it'll continue to be a "fight-escape" setup with that or if you have any later plans with them. I really like the both of them and your comic has a lot of character to it. The presentation with the television and the "Last Time on Dragon Ball Z" graphic was really neat. I think on the whole, I'd like to see you guys push your backgrounds a bit more in future comics. Outside of that though, really great work. Can't wait to see more from the both of you. Great job.

This is a really cute comic. Just a nicely paced little humorous comic that really was a lot of fun. I kind of like that the murder is a punchline in and of itself, doesn't really have much to do with anything outside of the tournament. These two are just a goofy little pair and I really would like to see some more with them in due time. The art style is really charming and cute. I remember enjoying the work you did last tournament, so I hope to see you both grabbing more collabs or battles, cause I love the work you both do. Great job.

the setup on this one endeared me immediately- its perfect for the characters and it was a really smart way to be economical with your pagecount and not have to do a ton of setup cleanly. Also worth it for the time allowance for you guys to do colour!

I really like the setup between your characters too- they play well off of each other and its fun to have a pair totally opposed to each other from the start. I do wish you'd given the same amount of attention to the opponents, though- if you're taking them out, you gotta make sure they go out with a bang.

I really likes some of the panel compositions here with the jail cell, really big brain stuff! Esp Satraxia gripping the panel border like it was the bars- really solid for it being relatively minimal and quick. Same with the greys- good, solid and easy to read.

Im sure you know this is coming but i wish it was longer! Time crunch is always a factor with octs but i would have loved to see koschei have more of a role in this, and for the ending to be less abrupt. even another page of them both escaping prison after smashing the other two with the hammer would have been fantastic.

Oh this comic is super pretty, and its very good at what it does! I found the start to be really funny, hinging on the classic cliches of anime with its gag and set up! You really kill it with the use of your colors and lighting, filling up the bg with the right color to convey mood, or playing around with it for actions in a way that's superb!

Koschei's death has such good emotional OOMPH to it, a good way to kill them off, and the ending is so gay gay homosexual gay(that 4th panel on page 10, whew!!!! Good for them, love to see a toxic couple)

Main issue would def have to be that it feels Violence and Koschei were more side characters in this story, to be disregarded? Like, its a very solid comic, and the start in how you bring them to space works from a comedic/anime cliche standpoint, but then when you drop that pretense later for a more serious comic between Jade and Satraxia, it leaves Koschei and Violence lying high and dry.

Overall loved your comic, you really killed it and I'd love to see what you do next with the duo if you go on!!!

This comic is really funny, short and sweet, with a solid amount of high quality gags, and some really smart use of panelling! The repeat bars-panel usage worked each time, and the dialogue is engaging in its comedic back and forth, real easy to tell each role each character is meant to fulfill and enjoy them all interacting.

It uses minimal grays well, and the style of the comic has a lot of charm to it, loving the way characters will pose, and their expressions all the way through!

In terms of like, critiqs I would make for this comic, its clear that it was a bit rushed, but life happens what can you do! I can't emphasize enough how much I dig the panel usage, and your comic flows very well, I noticed I was never getting lost with the reading order. But in terms of characters it feels like, Koschei was left out of the comic basically? Like, until the ending of page 6, he has one line and then serves to act as an addition to the scenery, which I get it! Jade only has eyes on Satraxia, so she's not paying attention which is what does them in, in the end, but then Koschei is more of a background set piece than a character, till he acts to move the plot along to its finish.

I did enjoy this comic a ton, very fun and full of hilarious dialogue! I can't wait to see what gags you pull out next, if you come out on top!!!

- Impressed with full color, shading, and overall rendering. There's lots of polish and detail. One of the most polished fully render comics I've read so far.

- Liked use of Satraxia forcefully turning Violence into a sword when fighting Jade. Ultilized the powers/properties of both characters well.

- The dialogue fits the tone of saturday morning anime well.
- Still, such dialogue has the same issues of being awkward and stiff, at times.

- Leaves interesting characterization to be desired.
- Such as when Jade barely reacts to death of Violence and Koschei.
- Or expanding upon the dynamic between Satraxia and Jade beyond violence or taunts.

- Action/drama scenes between pages 5-9 are engaging and tense. Good angles, colors, and pacing between scenes.

- Page 4 villain minions are introduced in 1 panel and die the next, making their inclusion unnecessary.
- Could have allocated such panels for more interactions between characters.

- Good paneling variation, word bubbles were easy to follow using the Z-layout method, monochromatic tones were simple and effective.

- 1st panel of page 5 using negative space to depict jail bars is creative.

- 1st panel of page 5 doesn't clearly show that Jade is pushing jail bars to the side. Lack of motion due to stiff pose and motion lines creates a static image, with only onomatopeia as context.

- Liked how expressive everyone's emotions and poses were. Brings out the personality of each character.

- Dialogue and characterization was done very well, each line had a purpose to emphasize the character's personality, relatioships between each other, or context. Makes characters charismatic.

- How Jade and Satraxia are defeated in the end is lackluster.
- No motivation given to Koschei's sudden attack.