Oculama

I think I mentioned this last round but the Jax's willingness to completely derail the road trip on a whim to pursue really petty wants is a great springboard for comic plots. I appreciate the other passengers getting a brief (and a bit mean, even if Jax sort of deserves it) dig in over that very willingness to just do whatever to satisfy very minor wants. The laughter panel after BB shames Jax is nice, and makes Mehira's decision to join in checking out the "Kite" Museum all the sweeter.

There's some stupendous perspective work being done here, both with the interior (the long hallway shot of the kiddie museum was VERY nicely done) and exterior settings (the highway shot with the panels of Jax waking up overlaid were really good openers). Your expressions are another strength of the comic, with Jax especially showcasing a visualy delightful range of vexation. BB's scorn face was memorable to, and I like the subtle consternation of the museum attendant on page 4.

I'm a bit on the fence about the badluck lines that go from Jax at the bottom of page 4 to Mehira at the bottom of page 5 - I don't dislike it visually, but I did spend a bit of time on the read-through trying to figure out if them running all the way through the page rather than being localized meant something or were just an artistic flourish. Even knowing how Jax's abilities work, what happens to Mehira reads less as bad luck than it does Jax just being mean/ irresponsible, though I suppose you could very fairly argue that's a bad stroke of luck in of itself.

(In either case, I do like that the badluck lines sort of look like stink lines coming off of Mehira - absolutely reeking of misfortune!)

I like the persistent low-key humor throughout the comic. There's no absolute gutbuster punchlines, but every page is funny, and in a very commonplace sort of way that is tough to pull off as consistently as you've managed to here. I love the sad face on poor little baby Jax, the absolute consternation over finding out the Kite museum was a kid museum all along, and I especially loved the "sir can you please stop swearing bit."

Solid through and through on this one; you're R1 and R2 have terrific continuity with one another, and it continues to be a pleasure to watch Jax do Jax stuff~~~

OMG you had me laughing right out the gate on this one with those faces right next to each other. I like this concept so far of Mehira's opponent's being put in charge of looking after her, and with Jax the disparity in temperaments is a real goldmine; it's like if Timmy Turner didn't realize that Vicky hated him (or to use another Nickelodeon metaphor, the relationship between Tommy and Angelica Pickles, if Tommy was even more clueless of the caretaker's malice).

In any case, Jax's willingness, nay, eagerness to cause bodily harm to a child just to not want to watch after her is so much funnier than it has any right to be.

My main point of critique would be the allusions to the previous round opponents - while pretty clear if we've read the previous rounds (which, to be fair, I'm assuming is most of us), they seem a bit out of place, and did break the flow of my read a bit trying to figure out how/if they tie in to the remainder of the comic. They sort of work as an opening montage of sorts, but I think they're just a bit too free-floating in the larger story, as it stands. Perhaps if they included the relevant victorious OC in some way? Like, Mehira clearly shown listening to and enjoying the broadcast, or Jax reading a newspaper clipping about CW's arrest, as examples. I like the inclusion broadly, it might just benefit from a deeper embedding into the story from a meta POV.

I legit didn't track that there were zero dialogue bubbles in this until my third read-through, which I think is a testament to how clear the action and plot progression is conveyed by the art alone. That I was able to hash out Jax doing a little bad-luck attack on his temporary ward (and suss out how Mehira's unwitting counter-flip would probably pan out is pretty impressive, and shows a real growing strength of layout sensibilities on your part.

The variation in distances and perspective is pretty strong here as well - there's a lot of really-close-up face panels and detail shots, but (especially from page 3-6) a nice balance of further out shots to give breathing space in between the more involved panels, which makes for nice intra-page pacing.

A good, dynamic read, and a great showcase of your abilities in layout and movement of lines.

Jax wanting so badly to go to a museum of kites is adorable, an amazing contrast to his otherwise terrible antics. It really uses her childish side well, especially foiled against Mehira the actual child. Mehira's genuine enthusiasm and ability to adapt is a great contrast to Jax's inability to accept anything but what he wants right now, with no responsibility or thoughts of others. For critique, I would say that the part using the whole bus tour group feels a little flat on a first reading: without the knowledge that the museum is just for kids, everybody's lack of enthusiasm feels a little contrived. This makes much more sense on a second reading though, so it just needed that little context. Overall, fantastic!

A shame this couldn't be finished, as the premise and the gags are actually quite fun! The visuals are very good at showing off the characters to the point that you would barely need dialog anyway, and the simple setup of a coin flip making luck themed Runrik's Machines is exciting to play with. If there was any criticism not based on the deadline issue, it'd probably be that the comic could use a stornger sense of location. The exhibits only get seen after the coin is flipped, so we don't get a good sense of what they're supposed to look like or Mehira's relation to them until the disaster's already happening. Even with that, super fun and funny! A great time!

I really like the development that Jax just managed to take over as the bus driver and completely hijacked the entire road trip, perfectly in line with his personality. The backgrounds and scene layouts of the comic were fantastic! I really like the use of grey/faded colors for the background and black/detail for the front, a simple yet incredibly effective way of separating the foreground from the background. The ending, where Jax realizes it's not even the museum she wanted to go to and just straight up ditches Mehira despite her being the only one who respected Jax's wish to visit the museum is beautifully crude humor.

I really like the character drawings, which gave perfect emphasis to each character. Each panel was perfectly shaped and constructed to emphasize the size and motions of the characters (The best example is page 3, in which Mehira is running like sonic the hedgehog in the very foreground, and when Jax readies a coin to toss across the entire bottom 1/3 page, beautiful foreshortening). My only real criticism is that the backgrounds/paneling is a bit confusing. The best example of this is also on page 3, I initially thought that the front door they were running in from was actually a panel that Jax was partially stepping out of. It was also a bit hard to tell what was happening at the end of this comic/what happened to Jax. Otherwise, fantastic job!

omg baby Jax I love you baby Jax. It's really nice getting to see Jax more sympathetic in this one, like he's still being characteristically self-centered but it comes off as more vulnerable and I really like how that perspective broadens out his character. Her posing and expressions are really fun and exaggerated but at the same time there's also something really grounded about your character work that I love. Not to get weirdly specific but I really like the museum worker's design, it's very simple but feels real and their little bit of posing in the sign panel is subtle but lively, overall your art is very warm like that.

Also yooooo Beach Body she looks so scrunky <3

The paneling and compositions really stand out in this one, there are a lot of really creative, effective decisions there. I especially like the little zoom-ins on Jax's expressions, it gets the story across really nicely without any dialog just by showing Jax flipping from annoyed scowl to shit-eating schemer smile. I actually didn't notice that there was supposed to be dialog until just now rereading the description, I think the art carries the back-and-forth really well on it's own and it totally works as a silent comic. The one place where it does feel unfinished is the ending, as it is it feels like Jax sort of disappears but I'm guessing you had more planned there. Still, just with what's here there's a fun story that's carried by really clear and strong character dynamics.

Great to see Jax in action! Despite the unfinished nature of your comic, I appreciate that everything was still neatly drawn and easy to follow. Jax being the 'victim' of his own shenanigans is pretty funny. Thinking that he could con his way to a free museum visit had landed him in a babysitter role at the WRONG museum on top of it all lol. I do wish that there was more interaction between Mehira and Jax though. It kinda felt like a missed opportunity to expand more on this wonderful setup. Also gosh darn did you draw all those balls by hand? lol respect! I do hope Mehira finds her way home!

It's a shame that you weren't able to complete the comic. I thought the premise you got with both Jax and Mehira going to the museum together was interesting but the premise/context on how they got together was missing. I could tell that Jax's coin toss backfired on him but other than that, there wasn't much I could gather from the story. I love the expressions you gave to Mehira though and I thought she looked adorable. Jax did not emote much but the mischief in his expression was very apparent all around despite the incomplete state of the comic. My favorite has got to be the shot of him prior to the coin toss, it has that extreme perspective that I've come to love from your works it's almost like your signature now.

This chaos goblin just don't quit XD Its am amusing narrative throughline to see a character on a Roadtrip turn the concept on its head by doing something harebrained simply because they wanna. Your paneling per usual, is lovely. Despite the frenetic pace of this tourney, you've certainty found your stride with styling with your sepia tone and inks. Your backgrounds really help in setting the mood and stage of where they are as well. Jax's expressions and reactions never fail to delight with how exaggerated they are page to page. It makes following these badluck adventures really fun. It doesn't hurt that Jax's whimsical wants coincide well with Mehira! It's pretty charming to see her sole hand coming up to join him in the museum despite the false advertising. Also poor child- truly the cruelest fate! lol

Sorry to hear the deadline snuck up on you- thems the way with balancing tournies and life, but I'm sure we all appreciate what you managed to turn in! there's somethin to be said about silent comics without dialogue- it really makes you have to lean into your panel events by way of expressions, actions, etc. You started off with an amusing macro shot of Jax's miserable face with Mehira beaming which really sets the stage for what's in store. I'll admit despite the great angles and good tempo of events, I couldn't quite suss out the actual story, much less where they were. The environments are understandably bare to minimal which I think leaves the reader a bit muddled.
Still, a good effort all the same!

This was an amusing story. I doubly appreciate informing us of the linguistic joke - very solid assumption most of us would miss it, but I like that it was elaborated. Your art is extremely expressive looking and while none of the colors were finished, your ink-work is still really strong. I think a couple more solid blacks in there to give some shadows to help bring focus to certain panels would have helped. (Panel 4 on Page 2 for example is a little harder to parse.) However, again, you did a really solid job. I hope next round you can pull it together and beat your previous round's work. Great job!

I appreciate your earnest attempt here. Thankfully, your art and action was clear enough that I understood your story! The idea of a museum of luck (or more specifically, unluck) was very creative! While this wasn't finished, I really do hope you take the time to finish it up when you get this wrapped up because it looks promising.Ideally, when your wedding business is cleared out and more time is available, you'll be able to play with making more comics again! That being said, turning in an unfinished comic is always better than a default. Glad you gave us something, good work!