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I'm very impressed with the personality building happening over the course of the comic; you've quite elegantly established the temperaments of all 3 OCs in play in the opening pages without any diversion from the action/ objective introduced on page 1.
What's more, the way you play the characters off one another is a treat to read. Jennifer's strong sense of protectiveness and adamance makes for a great contrast to Ed's more dispassionate sense of right and wrong, and it's cool to see how Chris' rationalizing personality is able to interact with both of them.
But on to the action! And before that, the build-up! I love the set-up of showing the OCs carrying out an investigation in parallel and noticing some of the same signs/ having the same revelations right before the action re-aligns for the big showdown with the wolf. The beastie is properly intimidating, between the ramp-up to its appearance and its resistance to bullets, and its great to see Ed and Jennifer work together to fend it off.
And for all that, you even managed to slip some humorous bits into the comic, which were well-placed to enhance the reading experience. Chris' dry observations about the cat add a bit of levity to the initial tension of the missing cat, and the face Jennifer makes when looking at Ed's badge (I laughed out loud tbh) cuts a bit of the tension from the exchange, which feels appropriate since Ed isn't ultimately the antagonist here.
Very cool collaboration, and hope to see more from both of you, whether together or separately, in the future.
Great to see more collabs coming to the fore and this was no exception. Nice to see that despite it being a collab you allowed the characters to not get along and make for interesting conflict outside of 'missing cat'. Jennifer's super suspicions were great to see put to page as I feel it was the strong point of the comic.
If I had some notes it would definitely be the flow of action. There was a heavy leaning on tell as opposed to show. The missing cat in the end and supernatural culprit seemed almost ancillary when I'd hoped it'd be the thing that prompted a bit of character interaction/development between both parties. I know Jennifer had suspicions over Matrix but I had to re-read this more than once to realize the bottom panel of page 4 was Jennifer's tell that something was up with him- it wasn't entirely clear. Also I'd mind your panel composition. So much of your important content was congested or squeezed into panels that couldn't fit what was being said or shown. It's clear you enjoy drawing the characters, but definitely show the same love to your environments and backgrounds. I think at one point a table that Matrix was seated at was just a green swatch without much form or distinction. Which is not to say you have to render a true to life table. You could have fun with this style and simply make the elements in their world funky and stylistic but still readable as a table if that makes sense.
furlitz
This has really fun character dynamics, I like how the main conflict comes from Edward and Jen both having their own magic things going on that the other doesn't know about. Jen is so thoroughly in her own head and that makes a good contrast with Edward just genuinely trying to help, it makes for really funny moments when Jen just refuses to budge. I like the mystery angle too, though I think there could have been maybe one more page spent on the resolution with the cat's body, the page where it's discovered is great with that steady build up into Chris' reaction but then moving into the fight with the wolf so quickly kind of squeezes the moment for me. The wolf itself is great though, I love the design and it taking a bullet square through the head establishes the threat tightly.
So im going to primarily focus on one aspect that i kinda wanted to comment on, something that i noticed that kind of took me out of the comic
I feel like some of the lettering on this was a bit odd, i feel like the incomplete bubbles kinda take away from the experience, somewhat at least. theyre a bit messy and the text can overlap with the black of the bubbles, and i think nailing your bubbles and lettering would really help the experience no matter what the style of comic, it would also help unify the look of the comic.
xeno112
oh snap! I didnt realize this was a collab! awesomes!
Comment posted: September 6th, 2024 at 8:04 AM